You've heard people caution, "Don't pray for patience, or God will send you something to practice on!" Isn't that the truth?
I spent time this morning looking back over my prayer journal. Apparently somewhere towards the end of 2007, I asked the Lord for less of me and more of Him. I wonder if I would have dared utter that prayer had I known what form the answer would come in? Yikes! It certainly didn't come packaged with lovely paper and a pretty red bow. That would have been nice, but it would also have given me a choice - to open or not to open. Nope. There was no choice here. Depression is ugly, no two ways about it. It can sneak up on you slowly, or come out of nowhere and slam you to the ground. No matter how it comes, one thing is certain - it will bring you to the end of yourself with no where to turn but to Him.
Coming to the end of me, to the end of my strengths and what I could handle certainly falls into the category of less of me and more of Him. I turned to Him and He did not disappoint. He continues to show Himself faithful to His awesome promises. Depression still sucks and I'm pretty sure it always will, but I am resting safely in His hand. That's most certainly a good place to be.
Let me encourage you today on your own journey. Maybe you're struggling with depression or some other "gift" you've been given. Whatever it is, NOTHING is too big for Him to handle. Karen recently posted about the myth that God will not give us more than we can handle. That's a lie we've bought into. He will most certainly give us more than we can handle so that we are forced to rely on HIS strength instead of our own.
I will admit, there hasn't been much in my life I couldn't handle on my own. That is why God, in His infinite loving wisdom, knew I needed this depression in my life. I needed to understand what it means to fully rely on Him. That's a funny thing to think about - the fact that I needed this depression. I can honestly say it is the answer to my prayers for more of Him and that makes me thankful, yes, even for depression.